Wednesday, September 10, 2014

My Story

My story doesn't start with cancer but cancer is a part of my life and has challenged and changed how I do life currently.

In February 2014 I went to our Dr with symptoms that had been slowly getting worse over a couple months time. I am a wife to the amazing Dale Glick and mother to three awesome sons and i wanted to keep ignoring my physical symptoms because I wanted and prayed for them to just disappear and life to go on as we knew it. We had a family vacation planned in Feb to Florida for my nephews wedding and i decided I was going to wait until after the trip to go to the Dr. Initially the Dr wasn't worried but she did refer me to a Gastro specialist. The specialist also wasn't worried but he did schedule a colonoscopy and endoscopy. When we did the tests they found a tumor in my rectum.

So that day we did a ct scan to check for more tumors those scans were clear and we were so thankful for that. I did 6 weeks of chemo and radiation 5 days per week. That was all done by May 23. I didn't have severe side effects and was very tired but most certainly not sick like I was warned I could be. We did a follow up ct scan the end of June to prepare for surgery to remove the tumor. I wasn't even home from doing the scan and my nurse called and said the Dr wants to see me at 2 that afternoon.

I knew right then that there was bad news. I called Dale and was barely holding it together. He was working in Lancaster that day so his boss dropped him off at the cancer center and met me for the appointment. The cancer spread to my liver. The scan showed 6 spots on two parts of my liver. The conversation we had that day with the Dr made it feel like my world was coming crashing down and I still can't write or talk about that day with out shedding tears. In his words " This means your cancer is stage 4 now and it that means we label it incurable and surgery is not an option for the near future. We will treat it with strong chemo and try to make the spots shrink then maybe do surgery."

Up until this point the Drs were very positive and had a plan that everyone was confident would get me back to life as before. But this day the nurses and Drs words were more like "I am sorry and we will make you as comfortable as possible" I wanted to yell at them and say - nothing changed - I am still reaching for healing - don't give up on me. We did more blood work and a liver biopsy in the next weeks and prayed for a miracle like never before. We got the results on a Monday and started chemo the next day. I am currently in a pattern of chemo every two weeks.

Through Leona Smucher who has become a dear friend and encourager to me and is a rectal cancer survivor herself we met lots of other survivors that have been such a blessing. One of those ladies was very blunt with me one day and said " I don't want to tell you what to do but - get a second opinion." She gave me the hope that things can be better than just waiting on chemo to work. She went to Mercy Hospital for a second opinion after being told basically what I was - Chemo to manage the cancer. She gave me the number for her surgeon and told me what to expect and how to get all my records. I am so thankful for her and her encouragement.

When I called them they got me an appointment for that week yet. The conversation with the Dr that day felt like hope in one way because he said he is willing to do surgery on my tumor and also liver at the same time and that was what we wanted to hear. But he said things like "You are giving me a big job" and "if the cancer spreads more before the next scans we will be in big trouble" and also "I am not a miracle worker - but I will do my best". I didn't cry in the Drs office but by the time we got to our car I was falling to pieces. I can't explain how low and discouraged I was the rest of that day and weekend. I cried out to God and poured all my frustrations in a raw ugly way like never before.

I felt guilty for being mad at God but Dale once again stepped in and spoke truth to my heart and reminded me that God wants me to be real with Him and it doesn't change His love for me. I am so thankful for God's grace and love that sustains me every day.

God has blessed us with amazing friends, church, and family who make up a community of support and encouragement to us daily. In my posts I will share stories of our daily life and also things God is showing me about Him and life along the way.

Be blessed!

8 comments:

  1. So glad to hear your story. Praying for a miracle in your life.

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  2. Praying for healing. Think of you OFTEN!! Thanks so much for writing your story. *hugs*

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  3. I've been so blessed to hear your testimony Carol! May God continue to carry you through your journey! Praying for healing for you!

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  4. Thanks for sharing! We will continue praying for your family, for peace, wisdom, and grace, but most of all for your complete healing!

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  5. We serve an amazing God,He is also our Healer! May God continue to grant you grace and strength and always remember you are blessed and highly favored!

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  6. you are such an amazing woman and I will continue to pray for you!! ~Madonna

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  7. You are an inspiration. Thanks for sharing your story; I look forward to reading your next posts. You and your family continue in my prayers.

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  8. wow!!I didn't know you whole story and this was so neat to read.Praying for you and your family .Praying that God speaks life to your soul everyday and heals your body completely!

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